After four months of silence... She speaks!

Dearest followers, I am in fact still alive and kicking despite my four month silence on the www. 
There simply isn't an explanation for my unplanned sabbatical other than I simply got "too busy." Yes, yes, I know that sounds pathetic, and quite frankly, it is, but in my defense, a whole lot of 'life' happened to me all once during my absence and before I knew it grown-up things like priorities and relationships sneakily crept their way above blogging on my list of daily activities. Ironically, time management was even a little skill I attempted honing in, but evidently that was a flop. 

Anyway, over a series of posts, starting from now, I'll shoot some breeze and catch Diary of a Daydreamer up with the happenings of my life from then until now. It's actually a little bit humorous as to the fact that most bloggers would give their front teeth for a backlog of interesting content to write about, but here I sit, almost a bit deterred at having to recap on too many monumentous (is that a word?) occurrences. I mean, the list goes from a 2 week long road trip along the Californian coast with best friends, to graduating my second year, to meeting the man of my dreams, to a fourteen day trip to England, to sipping coffees in Portland to moving back to South Africa, and everything in-between. I wasn't overreacting at the "whole lot of life happening to me all at once" bit, can you see?

And also, although my thoughts have not been colliding with the pages of my blog for a while, this little piece of personal cyberspace has been on my mind a fair bit. As one who always likes to shift, change and improve, in my own daydreams I've been brainstorming what the next phase looks like for my blog. I am actually 95% sure that I am going to be closing the final chapter of Diary of a Daydreamer very soon, only to open up a new book, I mean blog, and start afresh. I shall explain why and how and when in a later post, but I thought I'd maybe ask my followers for some thoughts on the idea? I think it's time for a change, as I feel my life has grown and evolved above and beyond what this little blog is capable of keeping up with. I'm thinking: name change, design and logo change, content alteration, the works. Good idea, yay or nay? I'd love to hear your thoughts.

With Love,
Jessica

It seems that I took an unintentional blogging sabbatical, but alas, I'm back and reading to make 2013 my blog's best year yet. 

The irony here is that I've probably had more blogpost-worthy material in these past two months than I've ever had, but I guess my busyness has been inversely proportional to the spare time I've had in which to document all my adventures, finding, memories, thoughts and photographic memorabilia. 

From the time I wrote my last post until now, I spent my second Christmas in the USA and also my second Christmas away from home, family and festive season traditions. It was a divine Christmas nonetheless and I was spoiled rotten as I sat under the tree and unwrapped an iPad send overseas by my parents. Not to mention all the Australian delights that were brought here with my friends Emma and Rachel who flew over to spend Christmas with me. These included the Frankie Magazine journal that has been on my wishlist since before Channing Tatum had abs, and then of course the 50th Edition of Frankie Magazine complete with a hand stitched cover. Of course no Australian present would be complete without an abundance of tim-tams and a tub of Lucas Papaw ointment. Let's just say I felt like a kid on Christmas. 

Another of my adventures included a 2 week long road trip down the Californian coastline with my Aussie girlfriends. We hired a car, set our cruise control and with our Starbucks in hand and blaring chick-tunes, we drove down the 101, thriving on being young, single and having nothing but the open road ahead of us. We visited Santa Barbara, Malibu, Santa Monica, Hollywood, Beverly Hills, Laguna Beach, Newport Beach, Huntington Beach, San Clemente and San Diego. It was the road trip to top off all road trips, and I practically got writers cramp from checking so many items off my bucket list. 

The girls and I waved goodbye to 2012 whilst sipping red wine and watching the sun set into the Laguna Beach ocean, and welcomed in 2013 with a seafood dinner in the Newport harbor. I feel even more madly in love with OC, and I will tell my children's children of our great road trip and the adventures of the Sisterhood of the traveling Vans. 

In other news, I started the second semester of my second year and now I face decisions of what lies next for me. To be in California for third year or to return to South African shores is the prominent question on my mind. I must say, it does feel great to still be only twenty years old and know that whilst I have so much under my belt, the world hasn't stopped being my Oyster, but instead the adventures that lie ahead are sure to outnumber those that lie behind. 

I also found myself a handsome Australian bloke who I now call boyfriend, and he has ensured that my 2013 has gotten off to a sterling start. 

Despite being busier than I've ever been and having to put on my big girl pants and get serious about time management, this little blog of mine is so close to my heart, and although it has somewhat slipped to the bottom of my task pile, I want to ensure that this year really is my blog's finest hour. 

I have so many plans, ideas and creative imaginings regarding this little piece of cyberspace, so stay tuned for a great year here at Diary of a Daydreamer.

Love to all my faithful followers,

Jessica 

Ramblings

Cabin fever is no urban myth. My weekend can testify to that fact quite auspiciously. The cause: my diligent over-achiever tendencies met with three lengthly assignments and a stormy weather from hell's armpit. The result: Not seeing the light of day for prolonged periods of time and cabin fever in it's purest form.
Now that the weekend is over and I've annihilated those assignments, I am ready for an intravenous shot of fun and all things light-hearted and whimsical. This afternoon as I slammed that final book shut in victory, I had to reward myself with inhaling some fresh country air, so I slipped into my combat boots, put on my fingerless gloves and my room-mates military jacket (I've demanded she leave this to me in her will), and took a lonesome stroll to my local Trader Joe's store for no reason other than to have thai curry samples and a tot of gingerbread coffee. There is such thing as a free lunch, apparently. 

It has come to my attention however that all work and no play makes Jess a dull girl and so this week, so help me God, I will have fun, whether it be in the form of a Settler's of Catan showdown, an O.C marathon, or a latte sipped across from a witty friend. 

Care To Support My Dream?

Lovely followers and blog readers,
Some of you know as per my previous 'Keep Calm and go to England' post, I am going to England next April. This is a real dream come true for me as I can hardly remember a time in my life when I didn't year to be under the grey U.K skies. 
I am not taking a vacation or a leisurely trip, but am going with a fiery missions team from my ministry school Bethel. Every year the school takes a team across the oceans to hugely impact the nation through the love and joy of Jesus. The testimonies from last year's trip were absolutely phenomenal and apart from ministering in churches and loving on people on the streets, the team was able to actually work with the police force and were able to minister within a brothel to some of the girls 'working' there. Overall, the team saw the craziest of miracles, people being completely healed by the power of God and many people come to know for themselves the love and saving grace of their loving God. This was a profound time for the nation, it's people and the team of radical students who have dedicated their lives to spreading love across the planet.
This year, I get to form a part of that team and get to live out my dream of seeing this beautiful nation fall in love with Jesus. I am a person who's life stands for something, and my dreams, visions and aspirations largely center around changing this world through love and the power of God which has been so undeniably evident in my own life and has shaped my personal testimony. I will give my last penny and my final breath to seeing this dream take shape in my lifetime. But, I cannot do it alone, and this is where I ask you to support my dream should you feel your heart stirred to do so. As a student I am needing financial backing in order to be able to get on that UK-bound plane with the rest of my team in April. There are a number of payment deadlines that I am needing to meet, starting December 7th and continuing until the end of March. The entire cost of the trip is $2200, and I have no doubt in my mind that as friends, family and believers in my dreams gather around me, I will see all the necessary components come together in the name of my dream being fulfilled.
So, should you wish to play a part, you can click on this link and donate towards my England trip. (all donations are tax deductible. Yay.)  https://missiontrips.ibethel.org/transactions/new/1379

Thank you in advance beautiful readers and I shall keep you posted in the weeks and months leading up to this exciting adventure.
xxx

On strategies and such

Today I had a bit of a mind-map Monday. You know when your inspiration is at max capacity and for want of keeping your sanity, you just must jot down an interconnected web of ideas? No? Maybe It's just me then. Anyway, a good friend of mine and I sat across from one another today at the only available table in a claustrophobically busy Starbucks. We mostly planned to get up to speed with each other's life and times, but as it goes when two people with even slightest nerd tendencies get together, the conversation ended up in brainstorming and strategic plan development. Then, Starbucks suddenly appeared to be rather uninspiring so we sat in the Marketing section at Barnes & Noble for the remainder of our hangout. Said friend has been asked to help a brand develop their social media platforms, and seeing as though I eat this stuff for breakfast, he asked me for a bit of input. I could talk strategies all day. Although, due to not having a degree to back up my passions (yet), I often disqualify myself, but today I realized that the way in which I come alive when my mind is left to wander down certain avenues, definitely tells of the direction I'm headed. 

Right now, I am currently desperado to get my hands on some juicy reads in the digital marketing/social media/blogging categories, so let me know your favorite ones because I'm going to single-handedly fund Amazon in the weeks to come. 

Ps: For those of you that could relate to my "On Being Organized" post the other week, check out these great links for tips on productivity and time management that I found on the Creative Women's Circle blog.
- Become a Productivity Ninja
- Organize Me: Desk Space
- Start With A List...

{My monday night's activities}

Keep Calm and Go To England

An hour ago I received some splendid news in the form of a missions trip acceptance email. As some of you know, I'm at a ministry school in California as I'm deeply passionate about spreading the love of Jesus to the four corners of the globe. As a part of our year, some 2500 students are given the option of choosing missions trips worldwide, and come April, we get flown to our respective destinations to impact the planet through love and joy. Ever since forever I have dreamed of visiting England; my family tree traces back to the land and I do love the Brits so. As you guessed it, my application for the England missions trips was approved and I will be setting off to the wonderful land in a few months time. I am elated at the fact that I will get to love, honor and serve such a beautiful and influential nation and it's people. April, come quickly!

Here's to tea, scones and posh accents. 

On being organized

Secretly, I've always wanted to be the that girl that floats around with chopsticks in her hair and paint stains on her hands that tell tales of late nights in her loft-apartment-turned-art-studio. You know, that girl that always looks oddly beautiful in her weird thrift store ensamble compromised of colours and fabrics that should never be within a 5 mile radius of each other. She's far too obscure to hold to a schedule of any sort, but blows where the wind does (or doesn't), she's never tied down, she walks to the rhythm of her own drum. 
Well, I'm the kind of girl that dances more on the edge of OCD than flower child. My brain functions in assembly-line format and even my thoughts are colour-coded (not really, but kind of). I do schedules, I do daily planners, I do time-management. I even plan for spontaneity. I'm that girl. And do you know what? I'm fine with that. I'm learning to love how I've been wired, even if at times I freak myself out. We can't all be the cool girl that wakes up one day and decides to buy a one way ticket to some Asian country that we've never heard the name of. Some of us are the girls that like to "get 'er done;" you know, the movers, the doers, the ones that have a black belt in checking off to-do lists. The ones that live their lives where no minute goes unaccounted for. Are we intense? Are we extreme? Yes. But that's why we're wonderful and we're saving the world one productive task at a time. 
Some wise guy who's name Google doesn't seem to know once said "Time management is self-management," and there you have it, the method to my madness.

Ps: If you read this and know you're on the nerd-girl team with me, check out Frankie Magazine's new journal for 2013, it will solve all your organizational issues one list at a time. Isn't it gorgeous?

{Buy online here. All Images courtesy of Frankie.com.au}

Things I Know As A 20 Year Old

- Cereal tastes better at night
- Unforgiveness is masochistic in nature. By choosing not to forgive, you're only keeping yourself in prison.
- We are all products of our experiences
- I don't love talking on the phone
- We were made to need attention. The desire to be noticed doesn't shouldn't be swept under the rug of denial.
- It's perfectly okay to say no
- The more we learn, the more teachable we should become.
- Facebook is a black hole that devours time
- I was not made for big city life
- Few things excite me as much as handwritten surprises in the mail
- I'd very much love to fall in love
- It's of vital importance to live passionate and live inspired
- There are times when pajamas all day is not only acceptable but completely necessary
- There's hidden powers inside a smile
- When it comes to making someone's day, it's always about the little things 
- A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush
- The dreams you have, carry with them the ability to be fulfilled
- Time management is self-management
- Every problem is just an opportunity in disguise
- The future belongs to those who believe. In people, in themselves, in their dreams
- The right font can be a matter of life or death
- How fast I run is directly proportional to the greatness of my playlist
- The future is now
- Listen.
- Wisdom is no respecter of persons or age
- I love change as much as I love routine
- Believing is not seeing, it's what takes place right before seeing 
-  Chivalry goes such a long way in my world
- Sometimes, a Venti is exactly what you should order
- There are seasons in nature. There are seasons in life. Embrace them. Dress accordingly 
- Revisit your childhood at least once a week, even if it looks like singing the rap to 'Fresh Prince of Bel Air' or finding hidden pictures in the clouds
- Midnight often brings with it all kinds of inspiration. Flow with it
- Rest is of equal importance to productivity and making deadlines
- Surround yourself with relationships that are two-way streets
- Make-up and beauty have nothing in common
- Differences are for celebration not criticism
- Children are great teachers; qualified by their purity and sincerity
- Excellence, good. Perfectionism, bad
- That friend that makes you belly-laugh. Hold onto them
- Control has no place in love
- A good writer is simply a good reader
- The key to knowledge is in asking great questions
- Everyone's life contains lessons from which I can learn

Hardly Strictly Bluegrass

In keeping with my motto for this year of 'spending money on memories not material things,' some friends of mine and I hopped in the car for a some spontaneous San Francisco shenanigans last Saturday, and what a perfect YOLO day it was. Our mission was to see The Lumineers and The Head and the Heart play at the Hardly Strictly Bluegrass festival at the Golden Gate Park, and by the end of the day, our mission was well accomplished. The park was crazy. We estimated maybe twenty thousand people in total between all five stages, and I was claustrophobic for a good portion of the time. It was a great vibe, and all kinds of weird and wonderful folk gathered to watch the bands play. I loved seeing the festival fashion (the good, the bad and the ugly) and the different styles that everyone was rocking whilst the autumn sun came out to play. 

We came armed with snacks and picnic blankets, sat on the outskirts of the madness and swayed arm-in-arm whilst we sang along to 'Rivers and Roads.' After the show, we watched the sun go down at the Golden Gate bridge, took all your stock-standard tourist photos, and then walked a portion of the bridge whilst night was starting creep in. The view from up there is unprecedented. 

To end off the night in proper tourist style, we went to the Fisherman's Wharf, had clam chowder bread bowls at the famous Boudin bakery before singing 90's rock songs all way home to Redding like you should do on long car trips. 

I'll only be young once. Making it count. 

I Can't Live Without

I think that every girl has her list of products she just cannot dream of living without. There are certain essential items that I use almost daily, and I thought I'd share these with my readers and anyone looking for some highly recommended, tried and trusted, skincare and beauty products. I love that this list will differ from person to person as we all take our own special likings to certain cosmetics on the shelves of our favorite stores. So, here's fifteen things I cannot live without, what are yours?

1. Extra Virgin Minerals Foundation - The Body Shop

2. Nearly Naked Loose Powder - Almay

3. Ruby Woo Lipstick - MAC Cosmetics

4. Special Cleansing Gel - Dermalogica

5. Multi-active Toner - Dermalogica

6. Active Moist Moisturizer - Dermalogica

7. "William Tell Me About OPI" Nailpolish - O.P.I

8. Shea Lip Butter - The Body Shop

9. Eau De Toilette, Vanilla - The Body Shop

10. Lucas' Pawpaw Ointment - From Australia
11. ColorStay Liquid Eye Liner - Revlon

12. Cocoa Butter Body Lotion - Palmers

13. Cow Udder Cream - From the farmer's market (this is an excellent and 100% pure moisturizer good for face and body.)

14. Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin Body Lotion - Bath and Body Works Fall Limited Edition

15. Honey Autumn Apple Shower Gel - Bath and Body Works Fall Limited Edition

She's not a teenager no more

Last Sunday the 9th I departed from my teenage years and migrated north towards my twenties. This was my third consecutive birthday away from home and no matter how many times you do it, not being with family when you're celebrating your birth is never ideal. 

But praise be to the good lord above for blessing me so extensively with a group of friends here in California that loved me enough to make me feel like a million bucks on my birthday. I was spoiled like Comic Sans on a business card and got to eat my body weight in sugar whilst surrounded by a whole lot of good-looking friends. That's what dreams are made of.

But in all seriousness, I cannot explain how thankful I am for the years that lie behind me and all those that await me. This birthday, I was thankful for life and God's presence that has been so freely given to me. He didn't have to fashion me, number my days and fill them with all kinds of beautiful people, places and memories, but out of love, he birthed me into existence and it is his love that has held me all these years. So, as I step into the new adventures that this new decade presents, I know I am moving forward into new depths of maturity as an individual, whilst also learning what it means to stay childlike and never lose the youth that is mine in timeless place in which my spirit dwells. Childlikeness means joy, unashamed expression of individuality and remaining teachable no matter how much you've learnt in life.

So here's a toast to life, living it well and never losing the spring in my step that comes from knowing what a gift it is to be alive. 

Back.

My feet are finally on Californinan soil after a 36 hour journey that felt like it stretched on for weeks. If I never see another airport again it will be too soon. It feels strange to be back here. It's a foreign country yet so much is familiar. A sort of home away from home.
I'm missing my family and friends already, and after sleeping in my new and empty apartment alone last night, I was this close to wanting to go back to South Africa and just call it a day, even if it meant boarding another deathly long flight. I know this year is going to be even better and more adventure-filled than the last, but I guess I just need to have patience with myself as I make the mental transition. My body is here but my mind is still making it's way over. It's familiar here, yet still a foreign land and right now I just need some home comforts, so I will sit here with my rooibos tea and know that South Africa is always right here in my heart. 
I'm excited for the year ahead, and although I'll be in the same place with many of the same people as last year, I know it's going to be a vastly different experience. New surprises around every corner and bucket-loads of fun, no doubt. 
Right now I'm just trying to get this new apartment furnished and kitted out so it can stop echoing. Bare walls and empty spaces aren't so inviting at the moment, but I have many ideas and this place is a great canvas to for a creative mind to work with, so I'm excited to see what we'll make of the cute 2-bedroomed space. 
8pm and my eyelids weigh a ton. Jet-lag is luring me to bed. Goodnight California and I'll see you tomorrow for another sun-shiney day.

I love it - South Africa

Things I love about South Africa:

The sound the birds make in response to the rising sun. Rooibos tea before bed. Familiar faces everywhere you go. Salt of the earth people. The colours, of the people, of the sunsets, of the skies, of the land. The beaches that raised me. Hospitality. The smell of a summertime braai. The way it looks after it's rained. The sounds of the night. Star-clustered skies. Four seasons in a day. Freedom. The richness of the land. Thunderstorms. Winding mountain roads. Flavors. Our history and our journey as a nation. Wildlife. Curry, bunny chows and breyani. Occasionally having to chase a monkey out your house. The humor. A country that never takes itself too seriously. Jumping off the piers. World-class wine. Promenade skates. Humid air. The garden route. Surf spots for days, and days. Wide open spaces. A people shaping their future. The smell of burning sugar cane. The Drakensberg. Fresh fruit. Rugby braais and watching the men shout at the TV. The high spirits when the Springboks win the match. Biltong, biltong, biltong. Inside jokes, thanks Trevor Noah. Camaraderie. Christmas at the beach  in the summer. Open homes and open hearts. Spirituality. Wells of revival. A colourful country. The proudly South African spirit. 

From where the grass is always greener

In six short little days I will once again be hauling myself and my 46kgs worth of luggage from Durban to Dubai and then on to San Francisco where I will begin round 2 of my Californian adventures. 
Looking back over my shoulder at this exact time last year, I was overdosing my blog with posts about leaving home, traveling the world, flying the nest and whatnot. In that time of my life I was a rookie in all things pertaining to an overseas life. I was excited and my tone of writing couldn't hide it.
This time around, I am practically sweeping the fact that I'm leaving under the rug of denial in a hope that the day will never actually dawn. Am I looking forward to returning to the States? In many ways yes. Am I ready to leave home for another year? In most ways no. 
You see, I am ridiculously grateful to be a nineteen year old girl with the world as her oyster, an air ticket in hand and a year long American dream awaiting her. Don't get me wrong, I never stop reminding myself that I live an outrageously blessed life. What I have realized though, is that last time around I was ready to leave behind a string of things that I had taken very for granted. This time around, knowing what it's like to live without these things, I'm more reluctant about letting them go. Before I left last time, I was right there on the bandwagon with all the other negative South Africans wanting to flee to greener pastures and 'escape' this country's downfalls. This time around I know that the greener pasture is the one beneath my feet. The people, the culture, the land that is alive and pulsating with life, the sunsets, the sea, the sounds of the night, the smells, the food, the lifestyle second to none. These are just a few reasons why I'm sad to see South Africa disappear into the distance for another whole year. 
But, that being said and heartily felt, I don't doubt that California round #2 is going to be a whole lot sweeter than it's predecessor. I'm excited about returning to a foreign country that no longer feels very foreign but rather an extension of home. I can't wait to see familiar faces, and hear familiar voices although the accents remain foreign. I can't wait to move into the new apartment, catch the tail end of the summer and most of all, begin second year at ministry school which all along has been the method to my madness in wanting to live in America. 
Until then, if anyone needs me, I will be sucking the marrow out of what remains of my South African holiday, which involves a farewell party, family braais, restaurant dinners, all-you-can-eat sushi, and burning a couple holes in a couple dance floors. 
Moral of the story: Sometimes it takes arriving at a green pasture to realize that you've always been standing on one. It's all in your perspective. 

Legacy: What's Yours?

Instant gratification seems to be the theme of our generation. Let’s all just live for ourselves and the current moment; YOLO right?

Yesterday I had a bout of spare time, and found my mind strolling down deep avenues of thought. What led it there, I cannot recall, but nonetheless I caught myself mulling over the word legacy. As a girl of nineteen and three quarters, I’d probably be told by people of my age to stop acting like a retiree and concern myself with more trendy avenues of thought like what filter to use on my next instagram. This just goes to show, that my generation (myself included) pay little or no mind to the concept of legacy and the taste our lives will leave in the mouth of this planet once we are no more.

This is not about ‘save the trees’ or ‘go green,’ but the reality that whether we live like it or not, every one of us will leave our footprint on this planet in some way, shape or form. For some it will be a bloodline of beautiful children and grandchildren, for others it will be a worldwide business concept that changes the face of the globe (think Bill Gates or Mark Zuckerberg), or perhaps a series of novels that will make their way onto the bedside table of children everywhere.

Yesterday, I was caught up with identifying the legacies that have been left behind for me; the ceilings of previous generations that have become the floors on which my generation stands. There have been people throughout history that have fought for a day they would never see. Paid prices for things they’d never taste, and given their lives for people they would never meet. Think of the freedom fighters who shed their blood on the battlefield of human rights. Think of the 15^th century bible translators that traded their lives in order for the word of God to be read by every nation. Think of the inventors that stared in the face of failure and said “it can be done,” just so we could switch on a light, or pick up the phone, or hop on a plane.

Then there are legacies that live on in the hearts of men and women. The legacies unseen and untold that have their substance in the deep inner places of people that span the generational gaps. Legacies of love, of peace, of undeserved kindness. With every measure of oxygen inhaled, we are writing our stories, creating our legacies. A child is born onto a blank canvas on which he paints the picture of his life that will only be seen in it’s full measure by those who will one day stand at a distance and observe the portrait.  I want the canvas of my life to be an invaluable masterpiece that warms the heart and moistens the eyes of all that will one day enjoy its colors and brushstrokes.

If my life were to know no tomorrow, I want my head to rest assured on my pillow tonight in the knowledge that I lived a life that was a sweet taste in the mouth of this world and all it’s people.

I am creating my legacy, are you?

{Background image from emilymcmanus}

You can take me out of South Africa, but you can't take South Africa out of me

After 9 months on USA soil, I am finally back under the African skies.
As the plane hit the Durban runway, my heart leapt at the joy of being home and my eyes welled with tears as the airport sliding doors revealed my family and best friend standing on the other side.
Two whole days of travel (from Redding to San Fran to Dubai to Durban) is a brutal companion for a lone traveller, but the destination awaiting me was worth the uncomfortable airplane chairs.


Being back in my homeland is a longing fulfilled. Towards the end of my American adventure, I began to yearn for my country, culture, and people. Living outside of these familiarities is no small challenge. After living away from South Africa for the amount of time I did, I realized that there are things that we all take for granted daily that we are unaware we are taking for granted. Example: Friends with whom you have a long history of relationship; Places soaked with memories that stretch as far back as childhood; Family members that live one bedroom away at least or one car ride away at most.
Before I moved away, these things had become luxuries that valued far less than I should have. I'd never had to live without them nor did I ever imagine having to.
When I boarded that plane that carried me to a land far, far away, I was bored with all things familiar and needed a taste of life outside the nest. Don't get my wrong, I had such a good time, that this coming August I'll be doing it over again, but I guess since having my feet planted in South African soil once again, things are being viewed from new perspectives.


It's odd to be standing as a person who has changed and transformed so much, in a place and amongst people that don't seemed to have changed at all. Things are mostly the way I left them, yet why does it feel that 9 months away has allowed me to feel as though I'm tasting for the first time, things that were once my everyday norm? Everything about my country, home, family and friends seems new and different, yet there are still faint traces of years of familiarity that cling to them.
Every day I've been looking outside my window and wondering if it's gotten more beautiful since I've been gone, or if the lenses of familiarity just clouded me from seeing and appreciating this evident beauty all along. I think it's the latter.


I am simply adoring my 'new' Durban lifestyle as if I've never lived it before. I've gotten to watch the sun rise over the ocean and set over the rippling sugar cane fields once again. I've been able to surf the Indian oceans and see dolphins swim by yet again.
It hurts my heart a little to know that there are South Africans with hearts bent negatively towards this country and desires of running away to seemingly greener pastures. Take it from someone who once thought the same, it doesn't get a whole lot greener than this.


So, if anybody needs me I'll just be soaking up all this South African goodness over the next few months, and strike me down if I ever forget what a good life it is!

Reflections of a BSSM First Year Graduate

It's a good feeling to look back over your shoulder at the year behind you and know that although the risks were many, you do not have a single regret.


Anybody that has seen my post-highschool journey unfold will say it lies somewhere in-between an adventurous travel novel and your average roller coaster ride. There has been much swimming upstream in the name of following this heart of mine, and not so much slipping into the system. I am a firm advocate of being an individual and throwing yourself into the wind of your own dreams whilst not pretending that you're okay with squashing yourself in other people's expectations of what your life should look like. I'm not sure we were created to live under the ceilings of other people's limitations, but were made to run wild and free in the wide open spaces of our heart's longings. 
I made a decision to embrace this way of life when I closed the last high school textbook and although the uncertainties have been ever-present, so has the fun, adventure and fulfilled dreams. 


I made the risky decision to pack my bags last year and board a plane to California with a heart full of dreams, bags full of hope and a collection of question marks in my hands. I spent a year in the middle-of-nowhere at the foot of snow-capped mountains in a small northern California city, and every day as I breathed in the clean country air, I exhaled the peace of knowing that I was exactly where I was supposed to be. I can remember waking up daily feeling as though I had been soaking in a bath of God's presence as I knew that I was at the centre of His will for my life and my destiny was blossoming before me. It's almost ironic how God and the dreams in my heart led me to a seemingly insignificant dot on the map which ended up being the place that spent a year carving a statue out of a block of marble that was my life. This year I was refined. This place, these people have looked into me, seen what lies within and then chipped away the fears, uncertainties, insecurities and left me more myself than I've ever been before. Some people that have been here and done this say that they've been changed into a different person, I say that I've been changed into the person that lay within all along yet just needed some help showing herself. So here, under the Californian sun I met myself for the first time. 


And do you know what the best part of this whole fast-paced, whirlwind of a year has been? The people that have stood alongside me through it's entirety. There have been other crazy, burning-ones from every nook and cranny of the globe that heard destiny's call and found themselves here too. Together we have been shown what it really means to live, and discovered have all that a human being was created for. We have learnt that interdependency and not independency is the true order of life and that community is one of our greatest needs and greatest gifts. Has it been tough? Of course. Has it been worth it? One hundred times YES. 


A week from today I will go back to the place I came from, and I've heard it said that you can truly measure the extent of your personal change when you re-enter a place that remains unchanged. My hometown, my family, friends and 'old life' will be the true litmus test of my change. I will be home for just a few months before I come back to California for round two. Second year, come at me. I'm ready for all that you're bringing.

Snapshots

Cali Road Trip #1

My 10 hour San Francisco experience in pictures

TDCC BABY

Let's just say I am about to start manifesting with excitement at the thought of the events that are in tomorrow's line up.

A bunch of new friends and I, who are also fellow music enthusiasts, are all road tripping down to San Francisco to watch the Two Door Cinema Club concert. This has got the words 'time of my life' written all over it. I am more than just a little in love with this trio's vibey tunes, and cannot wait to jam like there's no tomorrow. Oh, and of course getting to see San Francisco for the first time is going to be a an experience and a half. Man, I love being a foreigner.

I am going to take an obscene amount of photos, and don't even mind looking like the tourist I am.

The concoction of hilarious friends, good music, and a road trip to a foreign city is the most perfecto recipe for a memorable day. Let the good times roll.